Thursday, September 23, 2010
Have mercy on me full moon!
I think what has made the last two months a bit challenging (besides the fact that I have no more skin left on my body from all the scratching & itching) has been the reality that 4 WEEKS ago my doctor looked at me and said, "She could come any day now!" That is what did me in.
I'll never forget the panic attack I had on the bathroom floor a year ago in our tiny apartment when what was intended to be a joke (click here to read about it) ended up with me on the floor, hyperventilating, when I saw that little pink plus sign show up on 8 different pregnancy tests. August the 27th, 2009 is a day I will never forget. I couldn't see how God was going to work out this whole "pregnant" thing. September the 30th, 2009 is a day I will never forget either. I couldn't see my life without the baby I lost that day.
And here we are, September the 23rd, 2010 and I am trying everything I can to make this baby come! I have power walked, eaten an entire pineapple (heard that it induces labor), inhaled spicy food, etc.... the list goes on and on. I have even been relying on tonight, because it is an official - 100% - full moon.
Last night while eating dinner and looking at the HUGE 98% full moon outside, Andrew asked me why I was going so crazy about getting her here. My answer was plain and simple. Because, I have been waiting for OVER A YEAR for her. To see her. To hold her. To touch her. To smell her. To watch her discover what it feels like to breath and cry.
By the time a woman starts to really feel pregnant mentally, emotionally, and physically they are usually a couple of months into the pregnancy already. So by that time, they only have about 7 more months to go. I have been experiencing that feeling for about 13 months! I am ready. My body didn't even have time to get back to normal after my miscarriage before I found out that I was pregnant again. So, to all of you out there that are looking at me power walking around my neighborhood like a mad woman.. I am not crazy. Just really ready to meet my baby. Don't judge :)
So as we were wrapping up our night, I looked at Andrew and asked, "Will you squeeze me really hard and break my water?"
All he could do was look at me, laugh, and say, "Two more weeks, just two more weeks..."
Posted by Terra